Vent...

Since my blog is now private, I feel I can vent and not as many people will know im upset! lol...

Well I need to vent about something and its been my life for almost a year now. Its only going to get worse as the heat comes and school gets out. I will be stuck home all day everyday with 2 kids and no car. My kids will be cooped up in the house and won't be able to go out and play because it gets too hot. I won't be able to go to the pool cause we can't get our new pool key because our landlord is behind in HOA fees. The account has been sent to collections so I doubt he is going to pay it if he hasn't by now.

Sure I have friends with cars, but who really wants to ask a friend anytime they need or want to go somewhere if they can hitch a ride with their two kids. Since school will be out, people won't have as much room in their cars now that all their kids will be home now as well. Not many people will have 3 extra seatbelts available. Sure I can walk to the pool. Again though, I have no pool key and probably wont be getting one. That was my only saving grace for this summer. The only thing I was relying on being able to do to get myself and the kids out of the house.

The other thing? I dont feel like I have much sympathy from the hubs. He has no clue what its like to be cooped up everyday and not see the outdoors until its dark out...He could do it for a day or two im sure, but knowing that its only for a day or two. This is my life. I LOVE my life. I love my boys, I love my hubs, I love my home. I DONT love our car situation. I feel trapped. I feel claustrophobic. Its depresses me. I know that if we had the money Jer would buy me a car in a heartbeat. I am grateful for all he does to support our family.

Its hard to not be able to leave during the day. To run to the store for one last ingredient for dinner. To be able to go pick up some meds for a sick friend, to be able to meet the girls for lunch, to be able to run to target for more diapers. Taking Kasen to swim lessons. Wish I could, but I dont have a car everyday to do that. My kid is almost 6 and can't swim. To run Quinn to the Dr for his umpteenth ear infection.... Little things like that. Even if I didn't use the car everyday, just the satisfaction of knowing that its in the garage if I need it, would make a world of a difference. I would feel a lot more free.

The one free day I do have is Thursday. Thats the day I plan everything and run errands and do everything. That is the day I don't relax and don't sit down. The hubby works from home that day and I get the car. I am go go go go go all day long.

Im just having a hard time realizing that school ends this week and I will feel more trapped than ever with 2 kids at home through the WHOLE summer, with no car.

I know it could be worse, I really do. We could have NO car at all. For that I am grateful...that we do have 1 car. But this is my life as I know it. I know there are other people in the same situation as me, but this is me and I am feeling trapped today and I came here to vent. Thanks for listening. Thanks for reading.

Crazy Hair

Quinn has some seriously crazy hair. He has a bad case of bed head ALL day long. I try to comb it, but it doesn't help. I wet it down...doesn't help. This is when he woke up from his nap the other day...fun stuff.

Mothers Day 2010

Mommy According To Kasen: I asked the questions, he answered...


Whats mommys name? Brittany Bruce
Whats Mommys favorite color? pink
Whats my favorite restaurant? I dont know...(I tell him to pick one)...Hungry Howies ($5 pizza)
How old am I? 29
When is my birthday? I forgot!!!! May 20th??
Why do you love me? because you love ME!
Who is my best friend? Autumn and Kassie and Jess, thats enough....
Whats my favorite song? Families Can Be Together Forever
Whats my favorite food? Mashed Potatoes
Favorite Drink? Cherry Limeade
Why do I love you? because, um...we are a family.
What makes mommy happy? Me being nice to you
What do I tell you? I love you
Whats my favorite fast food? Whats the place where they have star chicken nuggets? (Carls Jr.) YEEEEAH!
What am I good at doing? you are good at....feeding Quinn (LOL)

This was a special mothers day for me. I got to celebrate it with two kids, not one! I was about 8 mos pregnant with Quinn last year and sick! In fact I went to the ER the next day due to stomach issues. So this year was so happy! Not being pregnant and not being sick! We celerated by going to dinner and hanging together as a family. Im such a lucky mom. :) Motherhood is one of the most important things that has happened to me in my life. I treasure it, cherish it and hold on to it. I know they won't be young forever!

I'm in Love

They adore each other. They are both always so happy to be around one another and to play together.

Crawling in bed (the crib) to read Quinn a story. I have found him in there MULTIPLE times.

I sent Kasen in with the camera bc Quinn had just woken up and he took a picture of him

I am so in love with my boys. I am so happy that they are in love with each other. All the happy giggly moments they share has made everything I've gone through to have them, that much more special.

Kasen amazes me. He is a fantastic big brother. He loves Quinn more than I could have hoped for. When Quinn wakes up from his nap, if Im doing something right at the moment, Kasen will go crawl in his crib with him and play until Im able to get him out. We have a game we play called "find Quinns Pacifier" boring I know, but Kasen is so helpful and always willing help locate it. He hugs and wrestles, kisses and soothes. He has such patience with him. He takes such great care of his little brother.

Im sitting here having all these feelings about Kasen right now and not knowing how to describe something so deep. He is such a sweet spirit. I am so grateful to my Heavenly Father for letting me raise this wonderful boy. I'm doing my best, and I love him so much.

trying to entertain Quinn while mommy and daddy got ready the other day.

Hello!

Hi to all of my private blog readers! All through the next 2 days I will be trying to change my blog all around so please be patient with the construction. :) I will be trying to do it during nap times and down times! Step by step! Thanks so much for being my friend and wanting to read my blog!

UPDATES TO FOLLOW!!

Private

Hey everybody!!

I will be switching to a private blog in about a week. From there I will start updating. I am getting tired of people leaving annoying comments in japanese or whatever langage that is and so I want to be able to have my friends look at my blog, no creepy people!


With that being said.....If you want to be invited to read my blog, please leave a comment with your email address, or if I have your email address, just tell me you want to be invited.

Due to recent stuff going on, please don't assume that I will just know to invite you. If you want to read my blog, let me know! :)

I hope this helps weed out the weird comments!


THANKS GUYS!

HAPPY BLOGGING!