Coke and Paper DON'T mix!

Tonight I tried to make some thank you cards for my mom to send to those who have cooked meals for our family while my dad has been recovering from his surgery. I got all my scrapbook stuff out, had it all sorted and spread out on the table. Kasen was "helping" me on the chair next to me. I was on my 3rd of card out of 5, ALMOST done...I was getting a little frustrated as it was because Kasen was trying to "help" more than I wanted him to.

I was just finishing my 3rd card when in ONE quick movement, Kasen knocked over my drink, JUST filled with Diet Coke and icecubes, and it GUSHED all over my cards and flooded them onto the floor. The ice cubes and coke went into my file box with all my paper embellishments. It went all over my paper and it started to soak up all the coke. It went into my lap, onto 3 out of the 6 chairs at the table, on everything that was on the table. I never realized one can of coke was so much liquid. Oh I was fuming! I grabbed Kasen, told him he was in time out, put him on the couch and RAN back to the table to salvage anything I could. All 3 of the cards were on the floor with soda flowing on top of them off the table. I try SOOO hard ALL the time to be as patient as I can. Bad tempers run in my family and I have ALWAYS said that I will NEVER be like my dad used to be. Through the years he has calmed down so so so so so much. I love my dad to death, but in that aspect I never wanted to be like him. In that moment, I have no idea what happened to me. I FLIPPED out! I had to call Jeremy so that he could calm me down. I have never experienced that much anger in my life at once. I am so grateful that I have Jeremy in my life who is so calm and patient and that he could talk me down and talked to me while I cleaned up the mess so that I wouldn't do anything I would regret.

I felt so bad for Kasen. He didn't do it on purpose yet I couldn't control my anger. I would NEVER EVER hurt Kasen. That would never be an option. But I wish I didn't even have to get angry. I wish I could have been sad, that about $30 of stuff was RUINED.

My anger is something I will always continue to work on. It's gotten a lot better through the years and I never want to be the mom that my kids or even husband are afraid of and so far I am not. But it's those little moments like today where I have to slap myself in the face and remind myself that I am a patient and loving person. For the most part I can keep my cool, but I think I get weak when I am tired or don't feel well. Which I actually haven't felt well the past couple days. Not an excuse, but I do feel weaker then. I love my son more than anything in the world. He is 2. Accidents happen and I am ok with that. I make mistakes too and I think I learned a HUGE lesson tonight.

How could I ever be mad at this face?